Before I start with the stories, I need to mention that Scott's grandmother went home to heaven this month. Memaw LOVED reading this blog and spending time with her great-grand daughter. I just wanted to mention her here and say that we loved the time we got to spend with her on earth.
Her entire eyelid turned black and blue over the next few days. I didn't take many pictures in February. It looks so much better now, but the glue ripped out a lot of her eyebrow. I am just praying it doesn't scar too bad and the eyebrow grows in well.
These pictures have nothing to do with the rest of the blog, but are all from the month of February. About 2 weeks ago, I was thinking I really didn't have anything blog worthy. So I just started thinking about the 48 hours previous to that and this is what I came up with. All of these are just part of our daily life with Miss Priss!
These pictures have nothing to do with the rest of the blog, but are all from the month of February. About 2 weeks ago, I was thinking I really didn't have anything blog worthy. So I just started thinking about the 48 hours previous to that and this is what I came up with. All of these are just part of our daily life with Miss Priss!
I was taking a shower and Hollyn had just gotten out of the bathtub. She was in my closet playing with my shoes and purses, and she was naked. (She is almost ALWAYS naked.) All of the sudden, I smelled something very bad. And I hear this little voice repeating, "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!" (No, she is not supposed to say that- just another battle)
Me: Hollyn what's wrong? Come out of the closet.
H: Oh my gosh! I see poo poo hanging out! Poo poo's hanging out! It's hanging out!
Me: What!! Go to the potty! Get to the pot now!
H: (Now screaming and crying) It's hanging out! It's hanging out!
Sure enough, she comes out waddling to the potty with a GIANT TURD just a dangling from her bottom. She goes to the potty and it gets smeared everywhere. She is screaming. I am yelling for Scott. It was nasty and dramatic.
We were trying to get Hollyn to get ready and head out the door to go eat with Scott's Uncle. She just kept running from us, wouldn't come to the car, etc. (another battle- transition from one thing to the other) So I thought we would play a little trick on her. Not the best parenting, I am sure -but I did it. I told Hollyn that if she didn't come we were leaving. I told Scott to start the car and pull into the driveway and lower the garage. I stood right by the door with the door open, so she was not able to run out into the path of the car or anything like that. He drove out and lowered the garage. I stood at the door waiting to hear her cry or come running with concern that we had left her. Nothing. Silence. For several minutes. So I finally went inside to see why she didn't care that her parents had just "left" her. Well, Priss didn't care because she had CLIMBED onto the counter top and OPENED the canister of SUGAR and was eating it by the handful! She was thrilled we had left so that she could have the house to herself and party!
Fast forward to eating at George's. Hollyn has had set backs since falling off the potty and slicing her eye. So she still doesn't poo in the pot well and has some accidents. We are sitting there eating and all of a sudden, "Uh-oh! I tee teed everywhere!" Sure enough she had an accident. So we run to the bathroom and she sits on the potty to finish going. I sat her down and got eye level with her.
We were trying to get Hollyn to get ready and head out the door to go eat with Scott's Uncle. She just kept running from us, wouldn't come to the car, etc. (another battle- transition from one thing to the other) So I thought we would play a little trick on her. Not the best parenting, I am sure -but I did it. I told Hollyn that if she didn't come we were leaving. I told Scott to start the car and pull into the driveway and lower the garage. I stood right by the door with the door open, so she was not able to run out into the path of the car or anything like that. He drove out and lowered the garage. I stood at the door waiting to hear her cry or come running with concern that we had left her. Nothing. Silence. For several minutes. So I finally went inside to see why she didn't care that her parents had just "left" her. Well, Priss didn't care because she had CLIMBED onto the counter top and OPENED the canister of SUGAR and was eating it by the handful! She was thrilled we had left so that she could have the house to herself and party!
Fast forward to eating at George's. Hollyn has had set backs since falling off the potty and slicing her eye. So she still doesn't poo in the pot well and has some accidents. We are sitting there eating and all of a sudden, "Uh-oh! I tee teed everywhere!" Sure enough she had an accident. So we run to the bathroom and she sits on the potty to finish going. I sat her down and got eye level with her.
Me: "Hollyn, honey what were you thinking?"
Hollyn: (smiling so sweetly) "I was just thinking about you!"
Lady from the stall next to us: "That is the SWEETEST thing I have ever heard!"
Me: "Sweet, yes. And manipulative too!"
So as I try to pull her pants back up, just to get us out to the car to change clothes, she goes NUTS! Screaming and kicking and crying. She refuses to put the panties or jeans on because they are wet. At this point, I just have to carry her NAKED through the crowded restaurant and out the door. I hope the creeps weren't out that night because everyone just saw my naked kid, lovely!
Next day: Hollyn wouldn't get dressed to go to gymnastics. Screaming like a NAKED banshee and running all over the house from me. She finally hides under her bed. After threatening and all that business, she still REFUSES to come out. She is crawled into a ball and using the fakest voice saying, "I'm so scared! I am just so scared of gymnastics!" So I have to wedge myself into the tiny spot under the bed and pull her out. I was so furious. Finally on the way to gymnastics, she acts like she is the sweetest kid in the world. As we get out she says, "I am going to obey because obeying is good for our bodies!!!"
Same day: I find her being awfully quiet in the bathroom. I go in to see what she is up to. She has proceeded to rip a spot of wallpaper off the wall! Before I can say anything she says, "There was just too much on the wall. I had to take some off! See?" I didn't spank because I was a bit mad, so I took her to the time out chair. She usually HATES it and cries and chokes and all that jazz. So to try to get me to pay attention to her as she sits in time out she does this...
Next day: Hollyn wouldn't get dressed to go to gymnastics. Screaming like a NAKED banshee and running all over the house from me. She finally hides under her bed. After threatening and all that business, she still REFUSES to come out. She is crawled into a ball and using the fakest voice saying, "I'm so scared! I am just so scared of gymnastics!" So I have to wedge myself into the tiny spot under the bed and pull her out. I was so furious. Finally on the way to gymnastics, she acts like she is the sweetest kid in the world. As we get out she says, "I am going to obey because obeying is good for our bodies!!!"
Same day: I find her being awfully quiet in the bathroom. I go in to see what she is up to. She has proceeded to rip a spot of wallpaper off the wall! Before I can say anything she says, "There was just too much on the wall. I had to take some off! See?" I didn't spank because I was a bit mad, so I took her to the time out chair. She usually HATES it and cries and chokes and all that jazz. So to try to get me to pay attention to her as she sits in time out she does this...
"Knock, Knock. Who's there? Banana!" "Knock, Knock. Who's there? Banana!" over and over. She sees that isn't working so she stands on her head with her bottom in the air (and yes she is naked) she TOOTS! And then she starts yelling, "Smell Time!! Smell Time!" Yes, she did. All of that within 48 long, but hilarious hours!
8 comments:
Holly is hilarious! I know she keeps y'all busy. I can't believe how old she is looking now and how long and curly her hair is. I hope y'all are doing well.
Oh.My.Word. I literally had tears coming out I was laughing so hard. The wallpaper story is too much. So unbelievable that she can come up with such genius manipulation. I am so glad you remember all of these hilarious details! Keep the stories coming!
i LOVE it! We need to get together! Will and Hollyn can play and you can meet baby Luke! I LOVE reading your blog! Makes me miss you! I'm so glad you are going to print it! I've printed some of mine and am about to print 2010.
I love reading your blog and I think you are a very talented mother!!!
Your blog is truly one of my very favorites! You don't have to cook well, clean well, sew, and run marathons to be a wonderful mother (which I think you are.)! Keep sharing those Hollyn stories!! I love them!
I am crying from laughter. I love your blog, I love reading every story about your lovely and wild child. You have the most entertaining stories I have EVER heard or read in my entire life. Keep 'em coming!!
This quote from the urgent care story from what Scott texted had me dying... "We are all set. Hollyn got glued up, Jill got a flu shot and I got a vasectomy!" hahahaha!!!
And if we ever have to go to urgent care, I can guarantee, we would have an identical experience. Oh the drama! ha! And if it makes you feel any better, we have had several of the tangling or already been dangled onto the floor poop experiences... as Josiah is STILL NOT pooping in the potty. LOL! :)
And Jill, I think you are an amazing woman and mom to be able to keep up with Hollyn and all her wild antics... raising a spirited child is not at all a walk in the park. :)
i love this whole post!! bahahaha!! hollyn got glued up, jill got a flu shot & i got a vasectomy :). oh my word. i didn't know urgent care did vasectomies ;). let me say...i do not know how to sew AT ALL. if we lose a button or split a seam, SHANE sews it!! and i don't cook a lot...tonight is frosted mini wheats for me & chicken nuggets for the kids. lastly, i do run marathons but largely b/c going on a run gets me away from my kids!! :) being a mom is hard, period. i don't know anyone who's got it down pat in real life. miss you, sis!!
Hi Jill! Are you making this up?! So. Hilarious. Hahahaha!
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