Monday, January 10, 2011

Out of the mouth of Hollyn...

These pictures don't really go with the post, but I had not put any of our family pictures on my blog yet. This post is about just a few randoms from the past month or so that I don't want to forget.

Our friend Hazel came to visit and that evening (at about 11:00!) I told Hollyn she had to go to sleep. I said Hazel has been asleep in her own bed since 8:30! Hollyn answerered, "Awwww! Her is SO lonely!"

We walked into a restuarant and saw a man wearing a cowboy hat. Hollyn points at him and says, "Look! I see a cowboy!" The next day we were at the park. A woman was watching her kids play. And I am not being rude, but the best way to describe her would be very plain. Hollyn pointed right at her and said, "Look! She is their nanny!"
As you know getting her to sleep is so extreme. She will often walk by the window and if it is dark, she will start to scream, "I don't want to go to sleep!! I can't go to sleep! I have to stay up all night long!" So we were trying to get her to sleep one night and at 10:30 she announces that she NEEDS to go up into the attic. She is begging and begging for Scott to take her to the attic. Of course, we say not going to happen. So she lays there for awhile and then she takes her hand and puts it on Scott's chin. She makes his mouth move up and down- as if he was talking. And she says, "I want to go into the attic! I want to go into the attic!" You had to be there but it was just hilarious that she thought she could make it look like HE was suggesting that they go into the attic at 10:30pm.
She is very into arguing. She will argue about ANYTHING! I was a little worn from running errands with her so I said,
"Hollyn I am so TIRED of the arguing."
H: "What's arguing mean?"
Me: "Like when I tell you the sky is blue and you say No it isn't!"
H: "I don't argue!"
Me: "Hollyn, yes you do."
H: (screaming at me) "No I don't! I DON'T ARGUE!"
Me: "Thank you, point proven."
Driving home from HEB today Hollyn announces, "We have tee tee holes and Daddy has a weenier!" (And no, we don't routinely refer to them as holes and weeniers- in case you wonder)

She told me that a child hit her today at gymnastics.
Me: "So how did that make you feel when that person hit you?"
H: "Not so good." "Sad."
Me: "So how do you think Ava felt when you hit her the other day?"
H: "Well, that was a LONG time ago."
Not only does Precious not go to sleep at night, she is fighting nap time like crazy! So I told her that she had to watch TV while I checked my email and she could not bother me, because I needed a little break. After about 15 minutes (it was strangely quiet) I went to check on her. She was totally naked. Also, there was water ALL over the wood floors.
Me: "WHAT are you doing!?"
H: "Bathing my baby. She needs a bath."
M: "Where did you get this water from?"
H: "From myself!"
M: "But wWHERE did you get it?"
H: "It's my tee tee!"
I am so MAD, I put her in the bath and throw the baby in the washer, etc. I look at her in the bath and say, "You know better. Shame on you!" She looks up at me and says, "Shame on YOU!!!"
I put her in time out until I can get the floor mopped up. Then I return to time out to find that she has peed all over her carpet while in time out! (and I fully believe it was not an accident)
I am thinking, one of us may not make it till she turns 18!
Hollyn is very curious about babies and breastfeeding and asks questions that I thought I would not be getting for a few more years. She and Scott were playing in her room. I could hear them from the next room. Apparently she was playing with babies and had taken her shirt off. (Getting her to stay clothed is another battle we fight) She laid her baby on top of her. I hear her say, "Daddy, have you ever seen a baby lay on you and suck your boobies?"
Scott: "Only mommies can give babies milk. Daddies can't do that."
H: "You can! Why not?"
Scott: "God just made mommies to be able to feed their babies."
So then she uses her imaginary magic wand and points it at him "Shhhhing!" "Now you can, Daddy! You can pretend to feed your baby with your boobies!"
Now Scott is a WONDERFUL daddy to a girl. He paints nails, helps play dress up and much much more. But fake breastfeed, he will not!


Jana said...

Oh my gosh Jill this whole post is hilarious. I am laughing so hard. Hollyn's mind is so unbelievable! I am so glad you write these things down - they are too good to forget. (Yeah I just used the word "so" three sentences in a row, but I couldn't delete any because I felt I needed them all for emphasis.)

Jennifer said...

I have no words, I can barely stop laughing. hahaha!! Jill, she is a genius, her ability to verbalize conversations like these are amazing. She is so smart and funny, and she knows it! LOL!! What a girl, what a girl!

Danyel Lintelman said...

Girl, you make me laugh so hard. You are full of the best stories!

lauren said...

That girl is so smart and hilarious all in one! You NEED to write a book! You have tons of great material!

catherine said...

Hollyn cracks me up....she is so beautiful and what an imagination!! Love the breastfeeding story!

Jesse and Dori said...

These stories are so funny and unbelievable! I love the one about Hazel being lonely:) Wish we could see that cutie more often!